Here we’ll share practical perspectives, understandings, insights and realisations about self, the mind, the physical, the world, consciousness – and everything and all else in-between as the multi-dimensional existence that we currently consist of and exist as; and within that: practical support and assistance methods/tools/techniques of facing this existence as self in the process of standing-up and standing-together in changing ourselves to change the world.

When you’re Nervous Asking a Question and Speaking up – Practical Support

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When you’re Nervous Asking a Question and Speaking up – Practical Support


Note: this is an expansion of my post “Help! Nervousness ruined my Moment!” in my blog “Moments with Me

I observed three primary things influencing me in the moment when I was overwhelmed by nervousness, which escalated into fear and anxiety: 1. Nervousness about the particular question / topic I wanted to discuss, 2. Nervousness about how the other individual would respond and lastly 3. Nervousness in relation to how the moment was playing out.

Another dimension to share here is how it all started: I looked at a point I wanted to ask them / share with them and within that point I was both excited and fearful - mainly because I didn’t know how they were going to respond – lol, so I to a certain extent prepared myself energetically with positive and negative energy for whichever of the two ways the conversation will turn out.
Interestingly enough, I was more aware of the excitement with the undercurrent of fear only ever so slightly noticeable in my solar plexus and body. So, I was in fact experiencing BOTH excitement and fear. When understanding how emotional and feeling energy of the Mind works: even though you may be in an overall ‘positive experience’ (for example, I consciously focused on the excitement I was experiencing) – the positive actually feeds the negative (the fear I was experiencing) a lot more, but was not aware of the undercurrents moving in the back of my mind and body, because my awareness was more consciously focused in the forefront experience of the positive / excitement energy than the background experience of the negative / fear energy.

So, the moment could have played out one of two ways: 1. The way it did play out – was that ALL the negative energy (fear) I accumulated together with the positive energy (excitement) discharged in that moment into an overall emotional overwhelmingness of fear, anxiety and nervousness. So, it was like the tidal wave of emotional energy opened up cause the floodgate for it activated the moment (according to my interpretation / experience of the moment) it turned negative / bad based on how I spoke, approached the whole thing and as well as the other’s response. OR it would have gone the other way 2. The way it would have played out if the response was (according to how I would have perceived / interpreted the moment) positive / good – then, ALL the negative / emotional energy from within the undercurrents would have pushed up and into the positive energy / excitement and so escalated the excitement experience into an overall happiness where the positive energy would have been more intensified.  
Therefore – dependent on how the moment plays out…either all the negative energy will push through into the conscious experience, or the negative energy will push into / fuel the positive energy creating that conscious experience of being REALLY overjoyed / happy.
(Note – I will do interviews available on EQAFE explaining the detail of how these dynamics between positive and negative plays out in the Mind, creating the crash into the negative or the rise into the positive. Essentially what is really involved in moments when you suddenly get overwhelmed by intense emotion or feelings dependent on feedback from your outside world)

Therefore I realised that there was positive and negative energy involved from the get-go of speaking up / asking the question. Then all the energy in my mind and body escalated into the moment where the very topic / question in my Mind (now essentially surrounded by positive and negative energy) were to be spoken into the physical. So, because the undercurrent was fear, anxiety and nervousness yet the conscious experience was excitement – my voice may have initially sounded ‘good’ and it ‘felt’ like I was in a ‘good space’ when I was sharing / asking…but my body and tonality was showing the fear, anxiety and nervousness. This is also interesting about negative energy – whether conscious of it or not, when it is an undercurrent moving ever so slightly in your Mind: it is in fact the negative energy that will come through in the physical more predominantly than the positive energy. So, in that moment I became the EMBODIMENT of the positive and negative energy I surrounded the topic / question with, in my Mind - and brought all of that into manifestation / creation in the moment.
Thus explaining here how and why it is that if one is energetically reacting to a point in the Mind and keep on feeding it energy – eventually it comes through you, through the body into creation / manifestation and this oftentimes leads to creating moments that are not supportive for you or another person – especially if they do not understand what you’re going through inside yourself and will most likely react to you.

The reaction from the other person is not personal – remember this. They are simply reacting to you, because they have no ‘program’ as ‘understanding’ to access / fall back in relation to you / what you’re saying and how – especially with all the energy you are coming at them with and more in fact how you change the moment you spoke / acted. Also, they’ve got different ways of dealing with things and you do not know what thoughts / emotions got triggered by you in that moment.
So, overall – within this first post, sharing what I could see in terms of how emotional and feeling energy builds up over time in relation to a question / point you hold onto in the Mind and how / why it happens that one’s experience will go to either extreme of positive or negative. More importantly: seeing here what contributes to your voice, tonality, body language and everything else coming out / through all weird / different and uncomfortable! It's thus not YOU, your SELF EXPRESSION speaking – it is you ‘channelling’ yourself through emotions and feelings, that manifest into the body and so creates an uncomfortable moment not only in reality, but also inside of you.
I have found this to happen especially when I do not / have not developed a way of communication / expression of ‘who I am’, where the only ‘foundation / program’ I have within me is to speak / express with emotional and/or feeling energy.

So, in the next post – I will share a process of self forgiveness and self commitment statements together with a way to approach these types of moments within you, to let go of both emotions and feelings and find that point of self expression within you where YOU speak / share / express yourself and not try and do it through emotions and feelings that can cloud your judgment and hamper your directive principle and creation of a moment within you and with someone else.

Getting to know Oneself through Observing Others

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Getting to know Oneself through Observing Others
The Evil that is Gossip (Part 3)

  
In the next post we’re going to have a look at how we as individuals can take personal responsibility first and foremost: see where within yourself you accept and allow this programming and participate in the perception, interpretation and assumption programming within yourself when observing other people. This so that you can for yourself see the extent to which you do this to yourself, as well as others in not giving them the opportunity to share who / why / how they are and in so doing – separating you from others in your own Mind with believing your own perceptions, interpretations and assumptions more than actually getting to know a person.

The main point that supported me in this process of ensuring I don’t fall into the trap of perception, interpretation and assumption – believing my own frames of reference / worldview more than actually getting to know another person: is self-honesty. Self-honesty from the perspective of assisting and supporting myself to, in the moment I observe another person / people and I identify reactions / movements of energy accompanied with thoughts and backchat: I’d do self-forgiveness within myself first and foremost, then realise that what came up within me was my limited reference / understanding as ideas I’ve formed of another person / people based on the limited amount of knowledge and information I acquired. If I do not have the opportunity to go up to the person / people and ask / get to know them, I simply SEE ME – meaning: realise that I in that moment actually more observed myself than others and when / as I do have the opportunity to go up to a person / people and talk with them / get to know them I then add / expand my already existent knowledge and information.

See, what is interesting here when it comes to observing other people and especially when our thoughts / backchats / projections and reactions activates, is that: in that moment – we are not in fact in a moment of observing another person as it is that we are observing our own MINDS.
I have, within my personal process, learned the most about myself by introspecting what triggers / activates in my own Mind with other people and have changed my relationship with many people by applying this one simple point: before I speak / act in relation to another person – I first check my self-honesty, my thoughts and reactions – walk forgiveness, breathe, make sure I am clear in who and how I am to essentially be able to approach a person in a moment with a ‘blank slate’ within me. Meaning – connecting with a person in a way where I essentially stand before them as “this is who I am” not as “this is who I am together with my thoughts and reactions about you”. Because otherwise, you don’t give yourself nor the other person the opportunity to genuinely ‘meet’ one another, as whatever they do / say you will filter through your already existent perceptions, interpretations and assumptions – always having a wall between you and them, and then LOOKING for things they do and say to confirm / deny your preconceptions. Then, it doesn’t become about getting to know them – the process becomes about you wanting to validate / justify your own frames of reference / worldview about things, because you are standing in the starting point of “I am right in how I SEE and what I SEE” – it’s all about solidifying the knowledge and information in the Mind, completely missing the plot of actually getting to know another person, intimately - really understanding and seeing what is within / behind what they do / say, the reasons for who and how they are. No one honestly has access into this (another person’s Mind, history and entire life) cause you only have access to your own Mind, your own thoughts and reactions and so you cannot in fact look into another person’s mind, history, their entire life to directly and clearly see EVERYTHING that happened to them to shape, mould and create them into the person standing before you in a conversation…

So, this is one of the primary mistakes everyone makes: thinking that you can ‘know’ a person just by looking at them or spending a little time with them – because for some reason, people have come to trust their own perceptions, interpretations and assumptions in the mind more and BELIEVE in that more than actually putting in the time and effort of getting to know a person intimately and having them SHARE who they are and WITH THEM through their words, stories and sharing of themselves and their lives SEE who they are through their eyes, through their words, through who and how they are with you in space and time.
So, with this, what I would suggest for everyone to consider applying and implementing in your own life is realising that – especially when you’re in the beginning stages of your process of understanding the Mind of thoughts, emotions etc. (here I would suggest researching the DIP Lite process that introduces you to the basic mechanics of how Consciousness operates and then DIP Pro that takes you deeper into your Consciousness in understanding how your thoughts and reactions creates behaviour / habits and so your general life experience with relationships, decisions / choices, the future etc. – how you through the Mind are in fact creating who, how and what you are and your life is and how to assist and support yourself to empower yourself to change your life through changing yourself for the better) – is realising that: whenever you are observing / looking at other people, take a moment and REMIND yourself to breathe, to first and foremost INTROSPECT and SEE what thoughts and reactions are coming up inside yourself, FIRST SEE what you can LEARN ABOUT YOURSELF in that moment, learn about your mind based on knowledge and information you accepted and allowed that is in fact limiting you from EXPANDING yourself / your knowledge and information within you as long as you react to perception, interpretation and assumption in your own Mind. Then to forgive the reactions, realise that what came up within you is what you understand NOW of what you observed / saw but it in no way can absolutely define another person cause you don’t have access to them, their minds, their lives nor do you know them in any way whatsoever – so you would be limiting you as well as them by holding onto your own beliefs and not allowing yourself to get to know them, their minds / lives.

So, this is the first step I would suggest assisting and supporting oneself with: see how much you can learn about yourself, your own mind through observing others and when you do have the opportunity to meet other people – do yourself and them a favour, make sure you’re self honest and clear upon meeting them and talking with them – to get to know them and so also get to know you, to expand yourself through getting to know other people – rather than limiting yourself to your own mind’s beliefs and ideas. Because this is the thing that’s at the core of creating gossip – people’s minds coming together validating each other’s beliefs and we need more people who have the courage to stand up and bring through some awareness and commonsense in such situations and sharing the consequence of gossip, making people aware of what gossip is and what we miss in our relationship with other people by believing gossip more than giving another person / people the opportunity to share who they are.

We’ll continue more in the next post…

Perception, Interpretation and Assumption: Creating Gossip

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Perception, Interpretation and Assumption: Creating Gossip
The Evil that is Gossip (Part 2)


One of the primary things that fuels gossip is the relationship between perception, interpretation and assumption. I have had conversations with many different people and the one thing that’s common when they started talking about others is: they in their Minds perceive another’s behaviour, then interpret it according to their own ideas / opinions of the particular behaviour and from there assume their perception and interpretation is correct because they believe their references in the Mind more than actually walking the space and time process of getting to know a person.

So, if you take a step back within yourself and access some memories (or simply observe your mind when you’re around other people) – within this having a look at the processes unfolding within your thinking / internal conversations when watching others: you’ll see how you’ll watch someone talk / move / do something, then slightly or overtly react to them, then in your mind’s eye ‘see’ a projection/imagination that encapsulates the overall ‘image’ of the person and then you’ll start creating an experience towards them based on your emotional / feeling reaction. From here, depending on the reaction being positive or negative and depending on what data/information/memories/programming you have already within your Mind – thoughts, backchats etc. will start activating. Here, your Mind is starting to create a relationship with the person based on emotion, based on feelings, based on data/information/memories/programming of your Consciousness.
For most part we have observed that people will approach / respond / simply stay away from people based on this platform in the Mind which constantly decides on the relationship with another based on perception, interpretation and assumption. Where individuals aren’t even aware of how little they ASK questions to another person, but in fact reference this perception-interpretation-assumption equation in the Mind where either positive and/or negative things will accumulate and as time passes – if the result is more positive, the person will continue a relationship, if more negative, the person will slowly but surely distance themselves.
So, it’s to for yourself see how this particular programming of your Consciousness operates. Referencing / believing this initial ‘assessment’ of a person in your Mind more than actually asking them questions, having conversations, spending time together and getting to know them – is causing a separation within humanity where you have so many people in very few relationships, both partnership and platonic and so many people who have no relationships at all. Where they either isolated themselves from people because of this programming or have been the unfortunate ones of being on the receiving end of this programming and others simply never gave them the opportunity to get to know them as a person.

I have met people who would go so far as compromising so much of themselves, just to portray an image / personality for others to keep everyone else’s minds happy – where they became astute at being able to assess what other people’s minds expect of them or likes / dislikes / prefers and accordingly moulded themselves to be able to please everyone’s (or as many as possible) minds. This primarily coming from and because of the gossip of others – but even then, despite these efforts, other people’s minds manages to conjure up gossip about one thing or another. Many people do this with awareness – maintaining relationships with others because of the fear of gossip, but do not have any other way of interacting with others and so base their relationships on keeping everyone else happy, while diminishing / limiting themselves…
In this, many people face a conundrum: if you are different – you’ll be isolated / ostracised and many depend on their relationships outside of the work environment, for example, when socialising, doing sports activities / extracurricular activities etc. If you are / do something that fuels gossip, it spreads, it affects your relationships, your general experience of yourself – but not only that, most of the people who’d gossip you may not even know and do not have or are not given the opportunity to share your side of things and so everyone is left to their own Minds, their own assumptions of you and you are powerless to do anything about it.

So…what do we do? What’s the solution?

In the next post we’re going to have a look at how we as individuals can take personal responsibility first and foremost: see where within yourself you accept and allow this programming and participate in the perception, interpretation and assumption programming within yourself when observing other people. This so that you can for yourself see the extent to which you do this to yourself, as well as others in not giving them the opportunity to share who / why / how they are and in so doing – separating you from others in your own Mind with believing your own perceptions, interpretations and assumptions more than actually getting to know a person.
From here, we’ll also have a look at what we can do to assist and support ourselves to find a balance in our lives – being aware and considerate, yes, of who we are in thought, word and deed but at the same time not accepting and allowing self to live in fear of gossip or other people’s thoughts / reactions towards you. Obviously being cautious of now wanting to rebel / go to the extreme of “I don’t care what other people think of me” and live in absolute disregard of others – herein we’ll open up the dimension of self-honesty and one’s starting point in thought, word and deed and how important this is in interacting and building relationships with other people, because if you’re going to take an emotional / rebellious stance of “I don’t care / give a shit” – this will obviously create manifested consequence in your life and relationship with others

We’ll continue more in the next post…