When you’re Nervous
Asking a Question and Speaking up – Practical Support
Note: this is an expansion of my post “Help! Nervousness ruined my Moment!” in my blog “Moments with Me”
I observed three primary things influencing me in the moment
when I was overwhelmed by nervousness, which escalated into fear and anxiety:
1. Nervousness about the particular question / topic I wanted to discuss, 2.
Nervousness about how the other individual would respond and lastly 3. Nervousness
in relation to how the moment was playing out.
Another dimension to share here is how it all started: I
looked at a point I wanted to ask them / share with them and within that point
I was both excited and fearful - mainly because I didn’t know how they were
going to respond – lol, so I to a certain extent prepared myself energetically
with positive and negative energy for whichever of the two ways the
conversation will turn out.
Interestingly enough, I was more aware of the excitement
with the undercurrent of fear only ever so slightly noticeable in my solar
plexus and body. So, I was in fact experiencing BOTH excitement and fear. When
understanding how emotional and feeling energy of the Mind works: even though
you may be in an overall ‘positive experience’ (for example, I consciously
focused on the excitement I was experiencing) – the positive actually feeds the
negative (the fear I was experiencing) a lot more, but was not aware of the
undercurrents moving in the back of my mind and body, because my awareness was
more consciously focused in the forefront experience of the positive /
excitement energy than the background experience of the negative / fear energy.
So, the moment could have played out one of two ways: 1. The
way it did play out – was that ALL the negative energy (fear) I accumulated
together with the positive energy (excitement) discharged in that moment into
an overall emotional overwhelmingness of fear, anxiety and nervousness. So, it
was like the tidal wave of emotional energy opened up cause the floodgate for
it activated the moment (according to my interpretation / experience of the
moment) it turned negative / bad based on how I spoke, approached the whole
thing and as well as the other’s response. OR it would have gone the other way
2. The way it would have played out if the response was (according to how I would
have perceived / interpreted the moment) positive / good – then, ALL the
negative / emotional energy from within the undercurrents would have pushed up
and into the positive energy / excitement and so escalated the excitement
experience into an overall happiness where the positive energy would have been
more intensified.
Therefore – dependent on how the moment plays out…either all
the negative energy will push through into the conscious experience, or the
negative energy will push into / fuel the positive energy creating that
conscious experience of being REALLY overjoyed / happy.
(Note – I will do
interviews available on EQAFE explaining the detail of how these dynamics
between positive and negative plays out in the Mind, creating the crash into
the negative or the rise into the positive. Essentially what is really involved
in moments when you suddenly get overwhelmed by intense emotion or feelings dependent
on feedback from your outside world)
Therefore I realised that there was positive and negative
energy involved from the get-go of speaking up / asking the question. Then all
the energy in my mind and body escalated into the moment where the very topic /
question in my Mind (now essentially surrounded by positive and negative
energy) were to be spoken into the physical. So, because the undercurrent was
fear, anxiety and nervousness yet the conscious experience was excitement – my voice
may have initially sounded ‘good’ and it ‘felt’ like I was in a ‘good space’
when I was sharing / asking…but my body and tonality was showing the fear,
anxiety and nervousness. This is also interesting about negative energy –
whether conscious of it or not, when it is an undercurrent moving ever so
slightly in your Mind: it is in fact the negative energy that will come through
in the physical more predominantly than the positive energy. So, in that moment
I became the EMBODIMENT of the positive and negative energy I surrounded the
topic / question with, in my Mind - and brought all of that into manifestation
/ creation in the moment.
Thus explaining here how and why it is that if one is energetically
reacting to a point in the Mind and keep on feeding it energy – eventually it
comes through you, through the body into creation / manifestation and this
oftentimes leads to creating moments that are not supportive for you or another
person – especially if they do not understand what you’re going through inside
yourself and will most likely react to you.
The reaction from the other person is not personal –
remember this. They are simply reacting to you, because they have no ‘program’
as ‘understanding’ to access / fall back in relation to you / what you’re
saying and how – especially with all the energy you are coming at them with and
more in fact how you change the moment you spoke / acted. Also, they’ve got
different ways of dealing with things and you do not know what thoughts /
emotions got triggered by you in that moment.
So, overall – within this first post, sharing what I could
see in terms of how emotional and feeling energy builds up over time in
relation to a question / point you hold onto in the Mind and how / why it
happens that one’s experience will go to either extreme of positive or
negative. More importantly: seeing here what contributes to your voice,
tonality, body language and everything else coming out / through all weird /
different and uncomfortable! It's thus not YOU, your SELF EXPRESSION speaking –
it is you ‘channelling’ yourself through emotions and feelings, that manifest
into the body and so creates an uncomfortable moment not only in reality, but
also inside of you.
I have found this to happen especially when I do not / have
not developed a way of communication / expression of ‘who I am’, where the only
‘foundation / program’ I have within me is to speak / express with emotional
and/or feeling energy.
So, in the next post – I will share a process of self
forgiveness and self commitment statements together with a way to approach
these types of moments within you, to let go of both emotions and feelings and
find that point of self expression within you where YOU speak / share / express
yourself and not try and do it through emotions and feelings that can cloud
your judgment and hamper your directive principle and creation of a moment
within you and with someone else.
