Sequence of Events vs. Time (Part 3)
Who I am as Patience (continued)
In this next post
we’ll continue the Self Forgiveness Process investigating why/how the emotion
as Impatience and the feeling as Patience is not the solution to the problem of
conflict we create between Time and Sequences of Events.
Self Forgiveness
(continued)
I
forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to see/realise
and understand why and how the emotional and feeling reactions of Impatience
and Patience are but momentary ‘band aids’ for the conflict I create within my
Mind and Physical Reality in the relationship
between Time and Sequences of Events. Where, I forgive myself that I haven’t
accepted and allowed myself to see, realise and understand that the reactions
of Patience and Impatience are but a ‘response’ to the conflict I create when
sequences of events do not fit into my initial projected ‘tunnel-vision’
time-frame and then I will either go into the feeling of Patience to ‘help me
through it’ or I will go into the emotion of Impatience to react to the
situation even more. In both instances – reacting in Patience and Impatience, I
attempt/try to either control me and/or the situation to get myself through it
all.
I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself
to see, realise and understand how the reactions of Impatience and Patience
cause me to not see the actual source of the problem, which is my internal and
external relationship to time and the conflict I am creating when I am not
walking equal-to and one-with sequences of events, but instead approach reality
in/as separation, through the Mind, within a projected time-frame of seconds,
minutes and hours. Therefore, the actual ‘problem’ is this core-relationship
between Time and Sequences of Events – as long as I do not sort out this
core-relationship: I will forever – when meeting this cross-road between Time
and Sequences of Events: set myself up for the reactions of Impatience and/or
Patience.
I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself
to see, realise and understand that Patience as a feeling-experience and
Impatience as an emotional-experience is thus energetic-forces that I create
through the Mind from the conflict between Time and Sequences of Events within
the Mind.
In this, I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and
allowed myself to ever question this relationship to Time and Sequences of
Events that produce the reactions of Patience / Impatience within me – with
ever considering whether there might be another way, because I have always
simply followed the examples of those that have gone before me and within this
believed that ‘this is the way it is’: “when waiting and you’re impatient –
calm yourself down with patience” / “when you’re waiting – be patient” / “when
you’re waiting and things aren’t going your way according to time – react in
impatience”.
I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself
to see, realise and understand how – with looking at Time / Sequences of Events
through the eyes of energetic-experiences such as Patience / Impatience:
actually blinded me from seeing the actual source of the problem I am facing as
the conflict I am creating between Sequences of Events and Time. That this is
what we do most of the time in our Minds as well when we’re accessing emotional
/ feeling reactions/experiences in relation to something/someone that comes
up in the Mind – we tend to miss detail, we miss seeing things for ‘what they
are / as they are’ and instead see things according to how we experience
ourselves –which in fact gives us only a one-dimensional view of what we’re
facing. For example, with Time and Sequences of Events: I didn’t initially see
that it is in fact this conflict I create in the Mind with trying to force
sequences of events into Time (seconds, minutes and hours) and with this ‘forcing’
– I create friction and the friction within myself produced the emotion of
Impatience and/or the Feeling of Patience.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to
make Time (seconds, minutes and hours) more than Sequences of Events, where it’s
strange how I in any way could conceive that I would be able to control reality’s
sequences of events through reacting to them – especially when accessing, for
example, Impatience – in a way saying to reality “well, if you will not move
according to MY time-frame – then this is who I will become/how I will behave
with going into Impatience and it’s YOUR fault”. In this, lol – trying to
manipulate reality, in a way, to get MY WAY; not seeing, realising and
understanding that – reacting is not going to change anything, but compromise
me / who I am and how I behave.
In this, I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed
myself to always try and ‘fight’ reality with Impatience or try and ‘wait’ for
reality with Patience – never walking here, WITH reality in equality and oneness and directing
myself within and as it; where going into the reactions of fighting it with
Impatience or waiting for it in Patience is me actually making myself powerless
to my own life’s walk/movement in reality, because I am trying to fight against
/ wait for the very reality / sequences of events in/as which I am supposed to
direct myself to create my life / walk my life in/as. Because reality / the
external world is not going to create my life FOR me – nor is it going to
respond to me fighting against it – I have to be the one that creates/moves me,
and I cannot create my life / move me in/as this real world as long as I am
approaching it with internal conflict / emotional and feeling reactions in the
Mind.
In the next post, we’ll continue with how to change the
relationship between Time
and Sequences of Events from reacting to it in Patience / Impatience – to directing
self within and as Time and Sequences of Events where no emotional/feeling
reactions are necessary. Then, finally – we can have a look at what Patience
would mean as a Living Word that is not limited to/as the definition of Time
ONLY…
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